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I briefly write to express my absolute hatred of the "new Jewel." I am sorry but no. No. NO. As a teenager, i enjoyed her first 2 albums published when she was writing as herself, and not a replica of a ms. pop idol barbie doll. I recently viewed her video for "intuition," a single off her new album. The once wonderful and original Jewel has turned herself into a new kind of "star," caked with makeup, with ugly pants, and booty skirts riding up her....pardon my french.
She wrote about humanity. She wrote about love in a matter to which i could relate. Her songs were thoughtful and the music serene, and calming.
But of course, what's expression worth when there's money involved?
Just today i was watching "the fabulous life of Britney Spears." (don't ask why VH1 went through such trouble to again inform us that ms. Britney Spears is rich and famous. ) apparently britney is worth 50 million, and can spend thousands in minutes. Okay. So, we say that Jewel wants more money. There's one little problem with her facsimilie image of Britney. Britney was first. i hate to say it, but its true. Britney ( or the hundreds of people working for her) came up with her first catholic school girl image, and on, to continously appeal to 12 year old girls, and all guys(yes, all). Jewel, after Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, Mandy Moore...etc. is treading down a well worn path.
Another notion that comes to mind is that she is "maturing" as many would like to call the aging of stars, and hence going on to try new things. Again, a slight problem. I (like many) do not consider dancing in underwear in a circle of hot guys "maturing." I call it a cheap and stupid music video without any point besides sexual attraction.
rant is officially over.
p.s. to kevin robinson: I can't get no...satisfaction...-_- :: Alina 11:15 PM
have you contemplated your insignificance to the universe lately?
The past few days have been hectic for me. Amidst panicking for chemistry(which i probably failed-_-) ive been thinking who i am. One of the conclusions I have come to is that I live my life as if it were a melodramy, which often stops me from thinking rationally. I think my life is a soap opera, and don't even know it.(mostly regarding hormonal attractions~) I will sit and write and listen to morose music and write melancholy poetry. Just like any other teenager who believes every wrong turn is the end of the universe. And i smell roses every time i see them. And think along the beach at night accompanied by the crashing waves. And am in love with sunsets. I bicker with my parents constantly, just like on a sitcom. I have tv esque problems that every teenager has but cannot solve except by purposely making a pre-warned mistake, regretting it painfully after(of course).
And to top it off, I hate people that do.
For the longest time, Ive believed I stood out from the rest of the world. Its kind of sad if you do not regard yourself in this way. Else-you're a statistic. As in the "Unknown Citizen" by Auden that we read for english.
"Our reserchers in public opinion are content
That he held the Proper Opinion for the time of year;
When there was peace, he was for peace; when there was war, he went.
...Was he free? Was he happy? The question is absurd:
Had anything been wrong, we should certainly have heard."
To be a statistic. A number in the matrix. Even on earth thats sad, but think about it universe wise. The universe is enormous. Huge. INFINITE(depends what theory you believe...) I stand behind the notion that there must be other species out there. Its impossible that there wouldn't be in the infinitely many existing conditions of the universe. So contemplate this. Not just common to your world, but to all the worlds out there that exit. [Granted, any commoner from another planet would still appear quite eccentric - im generally regarding one's perception of the races as a whole]
People like Einstein and Feynnman were truely eccentric. The explorers who took on the vast unknown will be remembered for eions and eions. The truely geniusly talented will also be recalled. Mozart. Maria Callas. The greats.
...So then i re-evaluate myself. Average height. "solidly built." I love the sciences, but am constantly afraid of not being good enoughto love them and be good at them. My theory has always been that people that were good at math and sciences can be good at anything. I'm not good at math. What conclusion may we draw? I'm always nervous about being smart enough and good enough. While Volfovsky and Levitus can spend their time reading or going out and having fun, i get to study and not understand material, and think about them going out, and me being stuck here thinking about it -_-
and yet sometimes I do feel like a free spirit...:: Alina 2:18 AM
Have you ever regretted not being part of something you didn't believe in , but had connections to?
lately ive had this feeling regarding religion. I've grown up in a secular family, and i've never believed in God(this is not an idea forced upon me, but a conclusion i came to...) I'm Jewish, and sometimes the line between ethnicity and religion blurs. And at times I don't feel Jewish. Tomorrow my friends are getting confirmed, and it got me thinking. What have i missed out on but lectures, hw, and prayers? I've missed learning about who I am.
People are cannot regard themselves as just what they physically are. They must look back in history to fully comprehend themselves. Look back into ancient times where Jews were enslaved by Egypt, when a people without a country were kicked out of every one they settled. Look at WWII, a spectacle of horrendous persecution. "The chosen ones" alright. How can you not feel pride, and amazement in realization that after such struggle-im alive. Alive! On the other end of the spectrum, look at how many great people have come from this tiny gene pool that makes up .02% of the world's population. Einstein, Feynmann, to name a few; Comedians, buisnessmen, doctors. Always excepted to be at the top. Is this religion or culture?
American children learn hebrew in hebrew school. But imagine what the language has been through.
Have i missed out on a culture that should have been my own?
"Mentsh tracht und Gott lacht" :: Alina 3:41 AM